I spent the last night at my house in Chorleywood in very much the same fashion as I spent my first night, in an empty house with a sleeping bag and rucsac full of my belongings. It’s funny how things come full circle. In the 359 days I’ve spent there so much has changed yet I feel I’ve come to a similar juncture in my life.
I once read an excellent dissertation on the concept of time in the Bible, and how things are not seen as linear; having a beginning, middle and an end but a circle, having a beginning, middle, beginning. My spiritual mentor at Lougborough described discipleship as an inward spiral; you keep going round and visit the same situations but closer to God.
In the Bible when momentous occasions occur they made physical markers to remind them of what happened. I try to take that principle in my spiritual life too, on the anniversary of my baptism I ask myself what I’ve learnt in the year and what I what to learn in the next. I play out a conversation in the head of me speaking with me a year ago and me in a year’s time, giving and receiving advice from my younger and older self. It may lead to me become bipolar but I find it helpful.
A moment about coming full circle in the Bible has haunted me this year. When Moses encounters God at the burning bush he is sent by God to free his people from the grasps of Pharaoh. Obviously Moses has his doubts and queries God on his choice of servant. However God replies with this,
“I will be with you. And this will be the sign to you that it is I who have sent you: When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you will worship God on this mountain.”
To be honest if I was Moses I would not be entirely satisfied with this as a guarantee, his sign that God was with him would be that in the future something would happen, they would return full circle and meet with God there. Not really a sign but yet another promise.
This is what faith is; trusting in God. Every circle of our life that we embark and complete we see that God has been with us, never has he lets us down and so we should believe that he will still keep up his promises in the future.
God’s statement to us is that when any chapter in our life finishes we will still be worshipping him for who he is. An amazing promise yet a hard one to implement.
At times the way may seem dark but we need to remember the faithfulness of God. We sing “You were, you are and you will always be” What an amazing statement, God fulfilled his promises in the Bible, he is with us now and will continue to do the same. Great is his faithfulness.
So as I come full circle on one chapter of my life I realise God’s faithfulness and provision, and though at times I’ve wondered what He was up to I leave Chorleywood praising God for his faithfulness and look to learn to trust Him more in the next chapter.